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Loving the Unlovable



Few commands of Jesus cut so deeply against the grain of human nature as the one we find in Matthew 5:43–48. It is one thing to love friends, family, and those who treat us kindly; it is quite another to extend love toward those who oppose, wound, or despise us. Yet in the Sermon on the Mount, Jesus calls His followers to do exactly that — not as a lofty ideal for the spiritually elite, but as a defining mark of all who belong to His kingdom.


Matthew 5:43–48 

43 “You have heard that it was said, ‘Love your neighbour and hate your enemy.’

44 But I tell you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you,

45 that you may be children of your Father in heaven. He causes his sun to rise on the evil and the good, and sends rain on the righteous and the unrighteous.
46 If you love those who love you, what reward will you get? Are not even the tax collectors doing that?
47 And if you greet only your own people, what are you doing more than others? Do not even pagans do that?
48 Be perfect, therefore, as your heavenly Father is perfect.”


Background

The Gospel according to Matthew was written with a primary audience in mind: the Jewish people. Matthew’s purpose was to present Jesus not merely as a great teacher or miracle worker, but as the long-awaited Messiah, the fulfilment of the Hebrew Scriptures, and the very Son of God. In doing so, Matthew carefully links Jesus’ life and teachings to Old Testament prophecies, showing that He is indeed the one promised to Israel.

This particular passage sits within one of the most significant sections of Matthew’s Gospel, the Sermon on the Mount (chapters 5–7). Here Jesus addresses an array of social, moral, and spiritual issues, many of which are drawn from the Law given through Moses. The sermon is not a random collection of moral sayings; it’s a deliberate reorientation of how God’s kingdom works, contrasting the superficial righteousness of religious tradition with the deep, heart-transforming righteousness God desires.

After His baptism (Matthew 3) and the inauguration of His public ministry (Matthew 4:17), Jesus begins to announce: “Repent, for the kingdom of heaven is at hand.” He opens chapter 5 with the Beatitudes (vv. 2–12), describing the attitudes and virtues of those who truly belong to God’s kingdom like humility, mercy, purity, peace-making, and perseverance under persecution. These qualities form the foundation for everything that follows.

In verses 13–16, He uses two vivid metaphors: His followers are to be the salt of the earth and the light of the world. This means they are to live in such a way that God’s character is seen and His presence is felt in a dark and decaying world.

But then, in verses 17–20, Jesus makes an important clarification: He has not come to abolish the Law or the Prophets, but to fulfil them. This was crucial, because some might have mistaken His fresh interpretations as an attempt to dismantle God’s commandments. Instead, Jesus affirms the divine authority of the Law, while correcting the distorted, shallow interpretations taught by the Pharisees, scribes, and Sadducees. His aim was not to weaken the Law but to reveal its deepest intent and to transform the heart, not just regulate outward behaviour.

Throughout chapter 5, Jesus uses the repeated phrase, “You have heard that it was said…” (vv. 21, 27, 31, 33, 38, 43). Each time, He recalls a familiar teaching from the Law, then raises the standard by uncovering its fuller meaning. For example:

  • On anger (vv. 21–26), He moves beyond prohibiting murder to addressing the roots of hatred in the heart.
  • On lust (vv. 27–30), He warns that even inward desires violate God’s standard.
  • On divorce (vv. 31–32), He calls for a covenant faithfulness that surpasses legal loopholes.
  • On oaths (vv. 33–37), He calls for truthful speech that needs no embellishment.
  • On retaliation (vv. 38–42), He replaces the cycle of vengeance with radical non-resistance.
  • Breaks social and ethnic barriers — Jew and Gentile, friend and foe alike.
  • Defies instinct — returning blessing instead of revenge.

  • Depends on grace — we cannot love this way without God’s Spirit.

Only after laying this foundation of heart-deep obedience does He reach our passage — perhaps the most counterintuitive command of all: love your enemies.


Explanation of the Text

1. A Radical Call to Love (vv. 43–44)

Jesus begins: “You have heard that it was said, ‘Love your neighbour and hate your enemy.’” The first part is a direct quotation from Leviticus 19:18:

“You shall not take vengeance or bear a grudge against the sons of your own people, but you shall love your neighbour as yourself; I am the LORD.”

But here is where the distortion came in. The Law commanded love for one’s neighbour, but never sanctioned hatred for one’s enemy. Yet over time, Jewish tradition especially under the influence of Pharisaic interpretation narrowed the definition of “neighbour” to mean “fellow Israelite.” Outsiders, Gentiles, Samaritans, and especially oppressors like the Romans were excluded. Worse, the idea of “hating your enemy” crept in as a supposed application of holiness and separation.

It is not difficult to see why. Israel had endured centuries of oppression, exile, and foreign domination. Many Jews viewed their identity as God’s chosen people through a lens of exclusivity and love was for insiders, hostility for outsiders.

But Jesus overturns this thinking: “But I tell you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you.” This was not a soft sentiment but a revolutionary ethic. Love here is agapao — not merely affection, but a deliberate, sacrificial commitment to seek the good of another, regardless of their behaviour toward you. In the New Testament, agapē (noun) describes God’s very nature (“God is love” — 1 John 4:8), and agapao (verb) describes His love in action (“God so loved the world that He gave His only Son” — John 3:16).

Loving enemies does not mean ignoring justice or condoning evil; it means responding in a way that reflects God’s own heart. Instead of revenge, Jesus calls for prayer, not prayer for their downfall, but for their blessing, their repentance, and their restoration. This requires laying down pride, releasing bitterness, and trusting God to work both in us and in them. In doing so, we imitate Christ Himself, who on the cross prayed, “Father, forgive them” (Luke 23:34).


2. Reflecting God’s Impartial Love (v. 45)

Jesus explains the reason for this radical love: “that you may be children of your Father in heaven.” To love like this is to bear the family resemblance. God’s love is not selective or self-serving — He “causes His sun to rise on the evil and the good, and sends rain on the righteous and the unrighteous.” In other words, God’s grace blesses all people without discrimination.

For Jesus’ Jewish audience, this was a direct challenge to their assumptions. They knew God had chosen Israel, but they often interpreted that chosenness as a license for favoritism. Jesus reminds them that God’s generosity flows to saint and sinner alike. The sun shines and the rain falls on farmers who worship Him and on those who curse His name. If this is God’s way, it must be ours as well.

This impartiality echoes Jesus’ other teachings such as the parable of the Good Samaritan (Luke 10:25–37), where He shatters ethnic and religious boundaries, or His conversation with the Samaritan woman at the well (John 4), where He reaches across social taboos. God’s love is not earned; it is freely given, and His children are called to display it in the same way.


3. The Limits of Ordinary Love (vv. 46–47)

Jesus then appeals to simple logic: “If you love those who love you, what reward will you get? Are not even the tax collectors doing that?” Tax collectors are despised collaborators with Rome who were notorious sinners, yet even they showed loyalty to their friends. Likewise, “if you greet only your own people, what are you doing more than others? Do not even pagans do that?”

The point is clear: ordinary love is a reciprocal affection for those who treat us well which is not the hallmark of the kingdom. It is common, instinctive, and requires no divine transformation. But kingdom love is extraordinary. It reaches across hostility, refuses to retaliate, and offers kindness where none is deserved. This love cannot be manufactured by human willpower; it is the fruit of God’s Spirit (Galatians 5:22–23).


4. The Ultimate Standard (v. 48)

Finally, Jesus concludes: “Be perfect, therefore, as your heavenly Father is perfect.” This is not a call to sinless perfectionism, but to wholehearted maturity — to reflecting God’s character in every aspect of life. The Greek word for “perfect” (teleios) carries the idea of being complete, fully developed, reaching the intended goal.

This echoes God’s command in Leviticus 19:2: “Be holy, because I, the LORD your God, am holy.” Just as God’s holiness sets Him apart, so His love sets Him apart — and we are to mirror that love in our relationships. The Pharisees pursued a righteousness that was outward and partial; Jesus calls for a righteousness that is inward and complete.


Theological Implications

Jesus does not abolish the Law’s command to love one’s neighbour; He amplifies it, pushing it beyond natural human limits. This kingdom love:

Paul later affirms this in Romans 13:8–10, teaching that love fulfils the Law. John echoes it in 1 John 4:7–8, grounding our love for others in God’s love for us. And ultimately, as Paul writes in Romans 3:21–22, our righteousness comes not from meticulous Law-keeping but through faith in Christ, who is the embodiment of the Law’s intent. Through Him, as Hebrews 10:14 says, we are being made perfect not by human effort, but by His once-for-all sacrifice.


Conclusion

In this passage, Jesus lifts the standard of love beyond anything human instinct can achieve, calling His followers to mirror the impartial, self-giving love of God Himself. Loving those who love us is easy and requires no transformation, but loving our enemies reveals a heart that has been reshaped by divine grace. This kind of love breaks barriers, heals divisions, and shines as a living testimony to the reality of God’s kingdom. It is not rooted in sentiment or mere tolerance, but in the deliberate choice to seek the good of others, even those who may never return the kindness. By obeying this command, we not only fulfil the spirit of the Law but also display the family likeness of our heavenly Father, whose perfection is our model and whose Spirit is our source. In doing so, we declare to the world that the love of Christ is stronger than hatred, deeper than division, and powerful enough to transform even the hardest heart.



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